Judging by an apparent incessant thirst, society needs its dose of reality television.

But it’s time network and cable programmers realize this infatuation is a clear overdose. From physical makeovers to video cams providing up close and personal action shots of women giving birth, it’s time we reel in on reality television.

We have an ample selection of American Idol shows and the copycats. It seems every network and cable station now has its version of Dancing With the Stars. The next time I see Susan Lucci’s pearly white smile will make me nauseous.

Give Gene Simmons his due as a trailblazing rocker with KISS. I still crank the volume when Ozzy Osborne’s Crazy Train plays on the radio. But pull the plug on the constant barrage of their dysfunctional families. Give A&E credit for affirmative action. Soon America can view the daily life experience of rusty rapper MC Hammer. Reality television does not want to be labeled racist.

We all know Denise Richards is a household name in entertainment circles. You remember Denise, don’t you? Denise, Charlie Sheen’s ex-wife. Okay, Richards is pretty hot, but it’s also a safe bet she is a textbook example of how plastic surgery and Botox can enhance your self-esteem. Still, does being Sheen’s hot ex-wife justify a reality show? Someone thought so.

Ratings must have declined for A&E’s first reality show featuring little people, Big World, Little People. That is the only reason I can come up with A&E’s second reality show based on the daily exploits of adults who are “height challenged.” The program is aptly titled, Little Couple. Personally I think it’s only a matter of time before we see a reality show that features a family of 7-footers ducking their way through life.

Of all the reality show nonsense, the one program that has the nation in a tabloid grip is Jon and Kate Plus Eight. It is virtually impossible to walk through a grocery store check-out line and not see some tabloid update on the couple who has given infidelity a sense of entitlement.

But all the allegations about Jon stepping out on Kate and Kate being a first class (you fill in the blank) seems to have boosted their public persona. Go figure. The country loves watching their public dysfunction unfold before our very eyes.

Not to worry. If Jon and Kate file for divorce it’s very likely A&E has some other eager family with multiple sets of twins or triplets chomping at the bit to replace Jon and Kate. Few could resist the financial windfall of jamming your family down the nation’s viewing throat.

But that is why we have cable and satellite dishes that provide 1,000 different viewing options. No one forces us to watch dancing stars, Gene, Denise, Ozzy or Jon and Kate.

But if we are going to be force fed reality television, why not give it some local flavor. Many communities, including Tomah, are fortunate to have a local cable channel. Maybe, just maybe there is some family in Tomah who would be willing to broadcast their dysfunction to western Wisconsin.

Who really cares about Gene, Denise or Ozzy when we have some very justifiable dysfunction in our own backyards? If some must overdose on reality television, the dosage should at least have some familiarity.

Bob Kliebenstein is a Tomah resident.